Business

“Melania” Trump Launches Complicit Clothing Line On Stephen Colberts Show

President Donald Trump having taken time to attack CBS Late Show host Stephen Colbert at a rally in his home state may have driven more viewers to the show the next night to see what the attack was all about. If so, they saw First Lady Melania Trump doppelganger Laura Benanti stopping by to help everyone figure out the meaning behind the message written on the back of that cheap Zara jacket she worn to and from one of her child detention centers the other day: “I REALLY DONT CARE DO U?”

Day of that visit, pundits had twisted themselves into pretzels trying to find a storyline in which that deliberate fashion choice – because the former fashion model does not make accidental ones – had NOT “hammered home the message her husbands baby jails only hinted at,” as Colbert put it.

Appearing Sunday at a national gathering of Students Against Destructive Decisions – SADD, get it? – Melania said “kindness, compassion and positivity are very important traits in life…Far easier to say nothing than to speak words of kindness.”

Responded Colbert: “Yes its even easier to say nothing and let your coat be a dick.”

The jacket incident raises the question: Is Melania Trump an innocent bystander trapped in a White House she does not agree with, or is she actively supporting her husbands cruelest policies? noted Colbert – aka “The Guy On CBS,” as President Trump called him at that South Carolina rally, apparently afraid to say Colberts name in his home state.

“Melania” informed Colbert the jacket had been picked out by “my personal stylist Stephen Miller.” Miller is one of the architects of Donald Trumps baby-snatching border policy.

Wearing that jacket to visit a childrens prison seemed insensitive, Colbert told her, wondering if it was an endorsement of POTUS policy.

“You should not believe my clothing!” “Melania” answered, opening her jacket to reveal a T-shirt on which was written: Believe My Clothing.

Colbert stared at the message. “Stop looking at my shirt! My lies are up here,” she scolded, directing his gaze away from her chest and to her eyes.

When asked why, being an immigrant herself, she is not doing something to help people suffering under her husbands policies, “Melania” turned around to debut her new Complicit clothing line. On the back of this jacket, was printed:

How Many More Monstrous Acts Do I Have To Support Before People Finally Start Seeing Me As Complicit In All This?”

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